TRANSFORM YOUR EMUNAH!

223 - Chanukah (Day-4)

What an incredible opportunity to wake up to another one of these holy days of Chanukah. Besides the tremendous mitzvah we have to light the Chanukah candles, one of the core focuses of Chanukah is "Lehodos Ulehallel" - to express our gratitude and praise to Hashem. And as Torah Commentaries outline, it is a tremendously opportune time and place if one is able to do so specifically by the Chanukah candles.
"Hashem, thank You so much during the year for giving me the opportunity to believe in You. And as You've taught us from many Torah sources, that believing means specifically taking that leap of faith when I am not able to see and understand Your ways. Because although the Torah is replete with passages along the lines of "Ein Od Milvado" - that You, Hashem, exclusively orchestrate every single detail in my life and in everyone's lives, and there is no such thing as the course of nature and the normal way of the world, however, at the same time, usually throughout the year, You want me to live in a world where You are hidden behind the veil of nature, and my job is to try my best to find You through everything I'm doing. Because again, the point of my existence and my ultimate ticket to eternal pleasure in the next world, as outlined by many Torah sources, is to excel to my maximum degree in my Emunah and Bitachon endeavor, and specifically to believe when I don't understand. Whilst at the same time, thank You so much, Hashem, for giving us those opportunities where we do see You loud and clear in our lives. Because when that occurs, it gives me tremendous inspiration and motivation to be able to see through the veil of nature, throughout the year, when You are hidden. 
Hashem, I'd like to just take a few moments now, whilst I have the opportunity, standing by these holy Chanukah candles, to look into my own personal life and appreciate and thank You for all the tremendous ways You've come through for me. Thank You, Hashem, so much for the gift of my health, the ability to breathe without struggle, the fact that I can see, and the fact that so much of the time I experience life without physical pain and suffering. Hashem, thank You so much for the gift to be able to have family, as well as the friends that You've given me, and the opportunity to share experiences together. Thank You so much, Hashem, for providing me from day one of my life, right up until today. Although there might have been times of struggle, and again, that You did for me also for good reasons, to help me grow in my endeavor of emunah and bitachon, however, at the end of the day, You have provided for me since day one, right up until today. 
Thank You so much, Hashem, for the opportunity to be involved in a life where I am aware that my main purpose is to develop my emunah and bitachon. Thank You so much, Hashem, for sharing with us Your incredible Torah sources that allow us to grow in this tremendous endeavor. Hashem, I want to thank You deeply for all those times of challenge in my life, because I know that You love me and You created me just to give me good. And if You're sending me a challenge, it's only because You're giving me an opportunity to be able to believe that everything that You do is for the best. When I'm struggling with the pain and suffering of this illness that You've sent me, after contemplating on the fact a little bit, I've realized, Hashem, that You would only send me this out of Your love, because again, that's the only reason that You created the world, to share Your goodness with me. 
And although there can be many reasons which are beyond my understanding, but one reason which I know is certainly applicable to me and objectively applicable to all of us, is that by sending me these times of darkness and suffering, You are thereby giving me a chance to practice my emunah and bitachon, that everything that happens is directly orchestrated from You, and You would only send me what is best for me. And similarly, thank You so much, Hashem, for all those times in my life that although I might not have experienced outright miracles, similar to the splitting of the sea or the miracle of the oil on Chanukah, however, I have certainly at times noticed Your divine providence in my life, and those times are certainly springboards of motivation and inspiration for me to live my life according to the values of emunah and bitachon. Thank You so much, Hashem, for these holy and incredible days of Chanukah."

222 - Chanukah (Day-2)

What a tremendous privilege to be able to experience another day of these tremendous holy days of Chanukah. As the well-known Ramban at the end of Parashat Bo mentions: although usually Hashem decides to operate according to the laws of nature, however, at times Hashem decides to break the laws of nature in order to teach us and inspire us that ultimately, the laws of nature are Hashem Himself hiding behind the normal way of the world, giving us the opportunity to believe that Hashem is truly pulling all the strings, and therefore, although in times of old the world was also operating according to the regular laws of nature, however, when it came to the time of the exodus from Egypt, Hashem decided to break all of the laws, turning water into blood, as well as all the other miraculous plagues in Egypt, and culminating with the miraculous event of the splitting of the sea. 
And as the Midrashim teach, not only did the waters of the sea split, but in fact, all water at all parts of the world split. Can you imagine for a moment: somebody's having a glass of water, and in an apparently obvious miraculous manner, the water in my cup splits. And when I find out that that happened to everyone in the world, and it was a clear miraculous occurrence, there is then no way to deny the fact that Hashem caused that miracle to occur. And in a sense, although witnessing such an experience is truly awesome, seeing the workings of Hashem so vividly clear, and not having the test of having to try to find Hashem through the veil of nature, however, in a sense, there is no opportunity to believe when one experiences such a miraculous occurrence, because I can see the workings of Hashem loud and clear, and that will certainly motivate me to follow the course of Emunah and Bitachon, and reach out to Hashem about anything and everything, follow His mitzvos with all their intricacies, whether I understand or not, and everything else that a life of Emunah and Bitachon leads to. 
Because after witnessing such a miracle, I am living now on the inspiration that it is absolutely clear that Hashem runs every detail in the world. However, as mentioned many times, the Ramban in the same passage at the end of Parashat Bo writes that our ultimate focus and purpose in this world is Emunah, and in fact, there is no other reason that Hashem created the world in the first place, except for giving us the opportunity to express our Emunah. And as the Vilna Goan and many others that we've discussed mention, the purpose of all the mitzvos is to come to having Emunah in Hashem. And that being the case, usually Hashem wants the world to operate in a manner that He is hidden under the veil of nature, and if we do not make an active effort trying to find Him, we will just see nature, and we will not see Hashem. But Hashem in His great wisdom also understood that at certain times, in order to give us motivation and inspiration, He needed to reveal Himself in a more obvious, apparent way, so that thereafter when He goes back into hiding, we can live off the inspiration and motivation that we gained through those moments.
One of the main purposes behind lighting the Chanukah candles is in order to publicize the miracle that Hashem broke the laws of nature and caused the amount of oil which usually burns for only one day, to burn for all eight days. Most of the days that we live throughout our lives are not outright miracle days, however much of the fuel that we are able to gain to drive our lives according to the values of Emunah and Bitachon, can and should be derived from these above-nature experiences. What a tremendous opportunity we all have to fulfill the incredible mitzvah of lighting the Chanukah candles. And similarly, what a tremendous opportunity we all have to perhaps spend a little bit of time talking to Hashem around the Chanukah candles, digesting and appreciating the tremendous miracles that Hashem brought about for us during these holy days. And b'ezrat Hashem by doing so, that can be a tremendous springboard for us to take leaps in our journey of Emunah and Bitachon.

221 - Chanukah (Day-1)

We are so privileged to currently be experiencing these eight powerful days of spiritual dynamite. Although usually throughout the year, we certainly are called on to make our maximum effort to grow in our emunah and bitachon, and as many Torah authorities outlined to us, such as the Mesillas Yesharim at the beginning of his book - that the purpose of life is to give us an opportunity to overcome the tests that Hashem sends us. 
And in many ways, we are called on to view life as if it were in our own hands, of course, always according to the values of Emunah, such as reaching out to Hashem and asking Him for help, but again, assuming that it is our responsibility to do whatever we can from our side within our maximum capacity to overcome the tests and challenges that Hashem sends us, which are ultimately opportunities to reach our maximum potential for our eternal reward b'ezrat Hashem. 
However, at the same time, these opportune moments that we have at different times of the year, where Hashem imbues a certain holiness, where the opportunity for connection is all that much more stronger; let us capitalize on the tremendous opportunity we have during these holy days of Chanukah, where the potential for closer connection with Hashem and for a tremendous boost in Emunah and Bitachon is available to every single one of us.
On Chanukah, we express our gratitude to Hashem, celebrating the tremendous miracles that He performed for us in times of old. We have the tremendous opportunity to perform the mitzvah of lighting the Chanukah candles, which ultimately commemorates the miracle which transpired in the Chanukah story. We know that the menorah in the Beis Hamikdash needed oil to be able to be kindled from. And when the Greek enemy destroyed the Beis Hamikdash, when the Jewish people came back and discovered just one jar of oil that was available to kindle the menorah, a miracle transpired and the oil, which was supposed to last for only one day, continued to burn for an entire eight days, an outright miracle. 
The message of Chanukah is coming to teach us what we are really trying to work on throughout the year - Emunah and Bittachon - that Hashem exclusively orchestrates every single detail in every single one of our lives. Yes, usually, for whatever reason, Hashem does not decide to come through for us via the means of outright miracles, but He usually rather opts to work through the course of nature; but as the famous Ramban at the end of Parashat Bo teaches: just like Hashem is the One who is able to break nature and go against the usual order of the way the world operates, such as by splitting the sea, causing the miraculous plagues to appear in Egypt, and by extension, when Hashem performs these outright miracles, such as when Hashem caused the oil, which is only supposed to last for one day, to be able to burn for the entire eight days - this is a tremendous opportunity for us to inculcate Hashem's perspective, the only true perspective, the Emunah and Bitachon perspective, that although yes, we are usually called on to work within the laws of nature and to make our maximum effort, as if we are in control, to do the best that we can, however at the end of the day we are never to forget, even slightly, that Hashem exclusively orchestrates every single detail in every single one of our lives. 
Just like Hashem was the One to change nature in the past and split the sea, bring about the plagues in Egypt, and more relevant to our times right now, to cause the oil to burn no shorter than eight times longer than it is supposed to according to the laws of nature, the message of Chanukah is coming to teach us that the laws of nature is just Hashem hiding within the normal way that the world operates, giving us the opportunity to look under the veil of nature and acknowledge that ein od milvado - there is nothing in the world except for Hashem.

220 - Erev Chanukah

The first part of Emunah that we've been focusing on and discussing is making our maximum effort to build our belief in Hashem, believing specifically when we don't understand and we can't necessarily make logical sense of many of the happenings in our lives, but nevertheless we are called on to believe that everything Hashem does is for our best; that all the mitzvos with all their precise intricacies have a very specific reason and are to be treated with utmost importance; that when we feel feelings of anxiety and worry, as the verse teaches, we have the opportunity and are called on to take refuge in Hashem and turn to Hashem for our salvation. 
And as we've discussed, there are many levels in what it means to do so. Although it is already a tremendously significant achievement when one has acknowledged and internalized to even a very minor degree that Hashem does exist, and therefore when I am experiencing some sort of trouble in my life, I do turn to Hashem, even if it is only for a few seconds or a few moments, instead of trying to go and find my own solutions, if I turn to Hashem and acknowledge that He is the one that can help me, that is a tremendous achievement. However, as we've discussed, there are many levels as to what it means to rely on Hashem. The more we grow in our Emunah and Bitachon, the more we will be inclined to turn to Hashem.
And as we've discussed many times, Emunah is our life's work. And although we are certainly called on to make our maximum effort in achieving our life's purpose, in growing in our Emunah, and one of the main ways we can exercise that effort is by exposing ourselves to what the Torah, the only true perspective, Hashem's perspective, has to teach about Emunah and Bitachon, thereby trying to incorporate those concepts more and more into our lives on a daily basis, at the same time, we have learned many times that Hashem only expects from every single one of us to make our maximum effort. Everyone has a different story, a different background, and many other factors that make up who we are. And certainly it is not our place and we cannot tell about the success levels of Emunah of one another. Our only focus is to make our maximum effort in our own lives to grow as much as we can, just a little bit more every day, to have that little bit more Emunah and that little bit more Bittachon.
Although on the one hand, throughout the year we are certainly called on to do our best in making an active and practical effort to grow in our Emunah, be it by learning Torah sources, seeking daily inspiration, asking Hashem in our own words to help us with our Emunah and Bitachon endeavor, and the like, at the same time, however, there are certain times and places that our opportunity to connect with Hashem and have an Emunah and Bitachon boost are stronger than other times and places. A basic fundamental to the Torah and to Judaism is that Hashem fills every single space of the world that we live in, and certainly Hashem hears us, whatever part of the world we might be in, as well as whatever time of year it might be. However, we are also taught that the opportunity for this connection is more potent at certain auspicious times and holy places. 
Although we all have the constant opportunity to talk to Hashem from our own homes, and we should certainly capitalize on that opportunity, b'ezrat Hashem soon when the Beis Hamikdash will be rebuilt and we will have the opportunity to come to the holy land of Eretz Yisrael and go to the Beis Hamikdash, there is no question that the opportunity for closer connection to Hashem will be all that more potent inside the Beis Hamikdash. 
The way I once heard this concept explained can be compared to Wi-Fi connection. The whole world is within Hashem's Wi-Fi vicinity, and there is no question that we are connected, wherever we are, whenever it might be. However, there are certain spots that the Wi-Fi connection is particularly strong, and the connection is therefore faster, more efficient, and the like. And similarly, when it comes to our connection to Hashem, there are certain times that our opportunity for connection has a tremendous boost. We are about to enter the holy days of Chanukah, eight unique days that have a tremendously electric energy in terms of the opportunity of our connecting to Hashem and building our emunah and bitachon. May we all merit to capitalize on the tremendous opportunity we have to boost our emunah and bitachon and connection with Hashem throughout the eight holy days of Chanukah.

219 - Grab The Opportunity!

Precisely when we don't see and we don't understand, there we have an opportunity to practice our belief, our emunah. I am not able to see Hashem, but I nevertheless have the constant opportunity to grow in my emunah and believe more and more that He is actually there, and when I talk to Him, He is listening to every word. And not only that, but as we've learned previously, the prayers that we make are so precious to Him that as the Midrash teaches, our prayers are taken and used to make up the crown of Hashem. 
And again, there are many levels to what it means to have emunah and bitachon in Hashem. A basic level, but certainly a significant level of accomplishment is when we internalize that Hashem certainly exists and can hear what we are saying. And therefore when I am experiencing a challenge in my life, I of course reach out to Hashem as my first address. But again, depending on how strong my belief is, will make all the difference of how motivated I am to continue those prayers to Hashem. A basic level would be to make a short prayer, but one with more belief will devote much more time and energy and passion to their prayers.
Because again, this is our objective in this world, specifically to have the challenge of emunah and need to practice our belief when we don't see. If we are currently in the presence of another individual who can help us, it will certainly then be much easier to talk to that individual and request what we need with sincerity and passion. And if they can truly help us, we won't be in a rush to go elsewhere, but rather will be happy to take however much time is necessary to express ourselves adequately. We cannot see Hashem and the only type of relationship that we have is based on belief. The more that we believe, the more that we will take that relationship and opportunity seriously. 
And just to remind ourselves of the idea that we've discussed many times, that many many Torah commentaries bring, that the only reason Hashem decided to create the world in the first place was because He desired to share His goodness with us. And this point is so important to remember throughout our lives and throughout our emunah endevour because when we remember that Hashem only created the world just to give to us, then it is easy to understand how the image that is sometimes portrayed of God as this old man with a stick waiting to catch us out, is a terribly mistaken approach and perspective of what Hashem is. 
We are so privileged to have the only absolute true perspective. Hashem created us just to share His goodness with us, and that being the case, although it certainly is going to be a challenge for us to grow in our emunah endeavor, nevertheless Hashem would not give us an impossible task. He is not trying to catch us out, God forbid. He's giving us an opportunity in this world to earn our maximum potential for eternal reward in the next world. This world is a world of opportunity where Hashem wants us to choose right, and thereby after us having achieved our maximum potential in this world, we will be able to enjoy His tremendous goodness that is completely beyond anything we can even begin to imagine that this world has to offer - in the next world eternally.
So it's important to remind ourselves that when it comes to our emunah endeavor, although we certainly have to make a constant effort to grow just a little bit more each day - every one of us in our own way, however Hashem is not going to judge us in an overly strict manner - anything that is beyond our maximum capacity. All that Hashem requires of us is to internalize that the reason we exist is to build and transform our emunah as much as we can.

218 - Understanding Hashem

Hashem created this world in a way that most things that transpire can be difficult for us to understand much of the time. Because again, we are taught that the only reason that Hashem created the world was because He desired to share His goodness with us. And although we are taught that ultimately that goodness will be experienced in the next world, we might have many questions such as, "if Hashem truly desired to give us of His best, why then did He not send us directly to the next world where we are taught that there the pleasure is so great that it is completely incomparable to anything in this world?" 
And although we do have certain answers within Torah literature, however for the most part the main answer is that this world is not a place of understanding. B'ezrat Hashem, in the future when we get to the next world, we are taught that then everything is understood and exactly why things had to transpire with their precise details as they did in our lives in this world makes complete sense; but in this world our job is to believe, specifically when we don't understand. 
In Judaism and Torah we are not short of mitzvos that Hashem has commanded us to practice. And for the most part, mitzvos are comprised of many intricacies and details that to the objective, logical mind, who is not coming from a Torah perspective, much of the time does not make sense. Although some of the mitzvos, such as the mitzvah of Chesed - to practice kindness to others, or giving tzedakah - charity, or perhaps the mitzvah to honor one's father and mother, where perhaps by those mitzvos it is easier to understand them, even according to our logical minds, however, when it comes to many mitzvos, such as for example many of the intricacies of the laws of Shabbos, one might argue, "is not the main purpose of Shabbos to be able to contemplate on the purpose of my life and have more free time to also build my relationship with Hashem?" 
And that being the case, if I find it more conducive to this, to observe Shabbos in a certain manner, perhaps not exactly in line with what the halacha dictates, I might argue that that should be the ideal course. However, we are taught that this is not the case. Adherence to halacha and following Hashem's instructions, even when that would seem to contradict the reason for the mitzvah based on our logical understanding, we are taught that we are absolutely obligated to follow the mitzvahs exactly as Hashem has commanded us. And again, as always, everything in life ultimately boils down to emunah - to believing in Hashem. Because this world is not a place where we are permitted to understand Hashem's workings and calculations. Our ultimate purpose in this world is to develop our emunah, our belief. Believing specifically when we don't understand. 
Whether it comes to the performance of mitzvos that might at times be more difficult for us to relate to based on our logical understanding. Or perhaps when it comes to the opportunity for us to rely on Hashem and try eliminate feelings of anxiety and worry from circumstances that surround us. And also perhaps when it comes to the opportunity of reaching out to Hashem and talking to Him in our own words. In these areas and many others, everything boils down to emunah. And as we've mentioned many times, by constant repetition of the Torah's teachings on Hashem's true perspective, b'ezrat Hashem, that can be a tremendous motivator for us to inculcate these concepts of emunah into our day-to-day lives. "Thank you Hashem for teaching me this golden information of what my true purpose is in this world and giving me the opportunity to be able to grow on a day-to-day basis more and more in fulfilling my purpose in this world."

217 - Appreciate Your Cash

We've learnt many times that Hashem is exclusively running every single detail in all of our lives. And with regards to our sustenance, there is no exception to this rule. As the Rambam states in the 13 principles of faith, "v'hu levado" - "and He exclusively orchestrates every detail to my life." And as we learnt from the Mesillas Yesharim, when we approach the topic of hishtadlus - of making our own efforts, we have to emphasize and make it loud and clear to ourselves that our efforts have zero effect on what we are trying to achieve, which sometimes can seem irrational and unrealistic to one not coming from a Torah perspective. Because can't you see? You make an effort and you get what you're trying to achieve; You don't make an effort, you don't get it. The mann clearly doesn't fall from the heavens anymore. 
Many people therefore mistakenly might be led to assume that Hashem used to be with us in the past, but He does not provide for us anymore. God forbid! Such an approach to hishtadlus is certainly borderlining on avodah zarah, on idol worship, believing that I am the one who dictates my destiny. And as we know, idol worship is the most severe sin that we have in the Torah, to the point that for real idol worship, one is obligated to even give up their life rather than succumb to it. So when we approach hishtadlus, we certainly don't want to go anywhere near anything that might even borderline slightly on the concept of idol worship.
We've also mentioned previously the Sefer HaChinuch, which is quoted in the Biur Halacha in chapter 1 of the Shulchan Aruch, where he states that if somebody does believe in Hashem but believes that there is also some other power that can contribute in addition to Hashem's power, that is idol worship. It is so important when approaching the subject of hishtadlus to internalize the words of the Mesillas Yesharim in 21, that the efforts that we make are just a tax, which means that our efforts have no correlation to the result and income that we bring in. 
The Gemara in Pesachim 118a teaches that Hashem's task in providing one's sustenance is equal to the task of splitting the sea, is more difficult than the task of bringing the ultimate redemption, and is twice as hard as the task of childbirth. Now of course, Hashem has access to all the money in the world. So when the Gemara here is teaching us that the task of Hashem providing for us is equal to the task of Him splitting the sea, more difficult than bringing about the ultimate redemption, and twice as hard as the task of childbirth, we are learning here that it is a big gift for one to receive one's sustenance. Although Hashem can do anything, He nevertheless desired that the way the world should work should be in a way that usually we have to struggle to some degree to receive our sustenance. 
We all are currently alive and have received sustenance in some form or another till this very day. Imagine for a moment we would have the opportunity to experience Hashem splitting the sea for us in order that we make our way through to safety. Most of us would talk about that and be inspired from that event for a long time. What about the ultimate redemption that we're all praying for to come speedily in our days? And anyone sincerely looking who has witnessed the tremendous miracle of childbirth can see clearly what a tremendous miracle that is. However, this Gemara is teaching us that the miracle of Hashem coming through for us and giving us our sustenance is so big that it is comparable to the sea splitting and greater than the miracle of childbirth and the ultimate redemption. "Thank You so much Hashem for providing for me every single day of my life in one form or another that until this very point in my life Hashem, You have always given me my sustenance. Thank You Hashem for being my exclusive provider."

216 - The Nature Of Money

It's worthwhile to constantly remind ourselves of this passage of the Mesillat Yesharim in chapter 21, where he writes that our efforts that we have a mitzvah to make - hishtadlus, is a tax payment and has no connection whatsoever to success in the endeavor that we are trying to achieve. Ein Od Milvado teaches us that Hashem exclusively runs the world and He does not need our help, nor do our efforts even slightly contribute to the results that He sends us. 
The Mishnah right at the end of the Gemara Kiddushin 82b states the following: Rabbi Shimon Ben Elazar says, I never saw a deer work as one who dries figs, nor a lion work as a porter, nor a fox work as a storekeeper, and yet, they earn their livelihood without toil. But all these creatures were created only to serve Me. I, however, a human being, was created to serve the One who formed Me. If these animals, who were created only to serve Me, can earn their livelihood without toil, then is it not logical that I, who was created to serve the One who formed Me, should earn My livelihood without toil? But us humans have committed evil actions and have therefore lost our livelihood.
This is another Torah passage where we learn Hashem's perspective loud and clear. Our sustenance comes directly and exclusively from Hashem. If not for the fact that we had committed a sin and are now under the effects of the curse that requires us to make our own efforts, we would then receive all of our sustenance without having to make any effort and be free to devote our time and energy in complete service to Hashem. Whereas because of the curse, we are now obligated to fulfill that curse and make efforts towards our parnassah. But again, just because we have a mitzvah to make an effort does not mean we have a license to borderline avoda zara - idol worship, God forbid, where one would be led to believe that their efforts are even slightly contributing to their successes. It is so important to internalize that yes, we have a mitzvah to make an effort, but God forbid to make any correlation between that effort and the sustenance that I receive. Hashem is our exclusive and sole provider. 
It is important to remind ourselves of what our purpose is in this world. Perhaps a worthwhile question would be: if Hashem would remove this curse and thereby not require us to make efforts to receive our sustenance, but rather would just send us our sustenance as He did in times of old, what then would I be doing with my time? The verse states that man was created to toil. The purpose of life is not to reach a place of retirement and pleasure. Rather, man whilst alive is meant to work and as the midrash teaches, if he merits, he will toil in the world of Torah and mitzvos, and if not, he will have to toil in other areas. Ideally, our lives should be devoted as much as possible to talking to Hashem, which as we've learnt many times is a huge mitzvah in its own right, to the learning of Torah, performance of mitzvos, and the many other spiritual areas which are the true reason for our existence.
The Midrash Rabbah to Kohellet chapter 1 states the following: Money does not satisfy. When one has ten, he desires twenty. And were a person to have a thousand, he would desire two thousand. As this midrash and many other Torah sources also point out, the nature of money is that we always desire for more. Even were a person to be the wealthiest person in the world, much of the time, if they do not have the proper Torah perspective, their desire will be to be twice as wealthy. We sometimes believe that were we to have a certain amount of money, all our problems would disappear. But as we've learnt many times, that is certainly not the case. The only true source of comfort is emunah in Hashem, because with belief in Hashem, we are always safe and content with our allotted portion. 
We need money to live, but our purpose in this world is to serve Hashem, and the only reason we have this mitzvah of hishtadlus which has no correlation to the sustenance we receive is because of the curse that Hashem placed on mankind. And as we learnt from the midrash, we were made to work, and the more we make efforts to dedicate our lives towards serving Hashem, the less we might be required to fulfill this curse. "Thank you Hashem for teaching me your true perspective."

215 - A Real Challenge

We've discussed the daily mitzvah to recite the parashas hamann and how the Torah commentaries teach that the main purpose behind reciting that Torah passage is to imbue in us Hashem's true perspective, which is apparently different to what meets the eye. In our eyes, we see a direct correlation between our efforts to make money and the money that we receive. However, as we learnt in the Mesillas Yesharim chapter 21, sustenance comes exclusively from Hashem and the only reason we need to work is to live out the curse that was decreed on mankind when Adam disobeyed Hashem's command and ate from the tree. And as the Mesillas Yesharim taught us, we are to constantly be mindful that our efforts are a tax that have no correlation to the results that they might seem to produce. 
As we've discussed many times, there are many levels to what it means to have emunah and bitachon, and this certainly applies to the area of parnassah - of sustenance. Although the highest level might be to internalize to such a degree that my efforts have absolutely nothing to do with the sustenance that Hashem sends me, however, as always, the reason we are learning these passages is to teach us where we are to aim, and Hashem is very proud of us and happy with us if we are just doing the best that we can.
"Hashem, my Father, thank You for teaching me that You are my sole provider, to the point that You don't need me to make any personal efforts whatsoever. Hashem, please help me to internalize the truth of Your perspective, that my parnassah - my sustenance, comes exclusively from You, and the exact amount that You want me to have, in the exact form that You want me to receive it, is determined exclusively by You. The extent of Your involvement in sending me my sustenance today is no different to how it was when You would send people man from the heavens. The only difference, Hashem, is that because of the curse that You placed on mankind, we are obligated to make our own efforts, and it now seems like if we don't make an effort, we will not receive our sustenance. 
And granted, Hashem, that I am therefore obligated to fulfill this mitzvah of making an effort, but please, Hashem, help me to take to heart the words of the Mesillas Yesharim and other Torah commentaries that we've learned, that the efforts that I make have absolutely nothing to do with the sustenance that I receive. And Hashem, I know You don't expect me to be more than I can be, and it is very hard to go to work and imagine that the work that I'm doing is actually not helping me to bring in my sustenance, but rather I'm just going to work to fulfill the mitzvah of performing hishtadlus. Hashem, I'm asking You to help me grow more and more each day, to live with more sincerity by the values of emunah, that You exclusively are my provider, and it is not me. God forbid, Hashem, I don't want to fall into the trap of idol worship in our day and age, where I might be led to believe that it is not You exclusively who provides for me, but rather my efforts help me bring in my sustenance. 
And just like in times of old, the forms of idol worship that were available to people was a real challenge, because people were able to go practice a certain magical procedure, and by doing so, would receive the sustenance or other needs that they might have needed. And similarly, in today's times, it makes it quite challenging that You have commanded us to fulfill the mitzvah to make our own efforts - to perform hishtadlus, because it is so difficult to divorce my efforts from the sustenance that I receive, when it seems so apparently obvious that if I don't go to work, You have no way to provide for me. Of course, I am obligated to fulfill the mitzvah and go to work, but if I might be sick, or when I might not be able to perform my hishtadlus for whatever other reason, please Hashem help me to then feel completely calm, that I am not worse off whatsoever, because You, Hashem, are my exclusive provider."

214 - Idol Worship Today

We discussed how although there is a mitzvah to recite the Torah portion of the mann, however the Torah commentaries point out that the main purpose behind this is for us to contemplate on the message of the mann, that just like in those times it was apparently obvious that Hashem was our exclusive provider because the mann fell in an obviously miraculous way from the heavens, and it was absolutely clear that our efforts had nothing to do with bringing in our provisions, so too in today's times, although Hashem doesn't operate in an obviously miraculous manner, the same Hashem who was the sole exclusive provider then is the same Hashem who is our sole and exclusive provider today. 
And as discussed, if Hashem is our sole provider, how does it make any sense that we have a mitzvah to do hishtadlus, to make our own efforts? And we mentioned the Mesillas Yesharim in chapter 21, who explains very clearly that although Hashem provides for us exclusively, there is a separate mitzvah completely unrelated to the concept of Hashem sending us our sustenance, where we have an obligation to make our own efforts. And as mentioned, the Mesillas Yesharim compares the need to work to the payment of tax. Just like when I pay tax, it does not help me one iota to bring in more sustenance, it is just an obligation that I have to take care of. In the same vein, my efforts, my hishtadlus, is an obligation that I have to take care of as a result of the curse that was decreed on mankind when Adam initially disobeyed Hashem's command and ate from the tree. 
Although we have an obligation and mitzvah to perform hishtadlus and make our own efforts, it is also important to highlight the dangers of hishtadlus, of making an effort, if one does not have the correct perspective. Many Torah sources teach us how in times of old, one of the strongest yetzer hora's, or desire for sin, was in the area of Avodah Zarah, of idol worship. And although, as the Gemara explains, that particular evil inclination was taken away and we today cannot understand the true extent of what it means to have a real, strong desire to serve idols, however, it seems very difficult to conceptualize why is it that the Torah makes such a strong emphasis to say shema twice a day, that there is only one God. For most of us, that is quite an obvious equation, that there is only one God.
Some Torah commentaries explain that the way it would work was that there were certain magical procedures that one was able to practice, and by doing so, one would actually receive what they needed. That makes it a lot easier to understand why the Torah would place such an emphasis to not go after those practices, but rather exclusively rely on Hashem. Because imagine, I need money, I know that if I perform a certain practice, be it with a stone or some other form, I will receive exactly what I need. That's one option. Or, I go pray, and maybe Hashem will send me what I need, or maybe He won't. What do I choose? 
In today's day and age, as pointed out by Torah authorities, we have a different type of idol worship. When somebody goes to work, the apparent result of that is I receive sustenance from that particular endeavor. And although we are called on to perform the hishtadlus, it is so important to highlight that if one is led to God-forbid believe that that is providing me with my sustenance, and therefore I am turning to that, even slightly, instead of turning to Hashem, that could be a comparable form of idol worship in our times. Let us take the words of the mesillat yesharim to heart, that the only reason we are commanded to work for a living is because we have to live out the curse that was decreed on mankind. Working for a living is a payment of tax that has absolutely no connection whatsoever to how we will receive our sustenance. Our sustenance comes exclusively from Hashem.